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Hi, my name is Emily. I am 16. I like dumb things, including all that fandom stuff. That is all.

douchebag-jesus:

antoniomadness:

gundamdick:

ALRIGHT LISTEN UP IMMA TELL YOU SOME SERIOUS GENDER MARKETING BULLSHIT THAT WENT DOWN TODAY

Today a woman came in to get her 13 year old son’s black iPhone fixed. This thing was totally fucking busted. She was already kind of being bitchy so I’m just trying to reassure her that everything will be fine and shuffle through the paper work so shes on her way. She leaves, I put her phone away till I have time to fix it.

Well come to find out that we were completely out of black screens until next week’s shipment. So I put on a white screen for now and reassure her that when we do get black screens in that I will call her and we’ll put the new screen on for free. Better to have a temporary mixed match phone then a broken one right?

This woman proceeds to flip her shit. “WE CAME HERE TO GET WHAT WE HAD FIXED!” I calmly explain to her that there is nothing I can do about the color for the time being. The son is totally fine with this and obviously embarrassed by his mother’s outburst. The woman snatches the phone, sneers at it, and then shoves it back into my hands and says “NOW IT LOOKS LIKE A GIRL’S PHONE! I AM NOT GIVING THIS TO MY SON!”

At this moment I turn to her and say. “I don’t undersand? How is it a girl’s phone now?”

"Well it was BLACK and now its WHITE!!" She gestured dramatically at the screen like I couldn’t fucking see it.

"How is white a feminine color?"

She huffs and explains that she refuses to take the phone until the color is changed. The 13 is now rapid fire “its fine its fine” cause he just wants his phone back. But she keeps refusing but I finally tell her again that we will change the phone for free when we get black screens and that shes not allowed to keep it here.

The point of the matter is that this woman almost refused to even take back the phone BECAUSE OF ITS COLOR. Mind you its not even anything like pink or purple. ITS. WHITE.

A SUBURBAN WHITE WOMAN TURNED RED IN THE FACE WITH ANGER BEAUSE SHE THOUGHT WHITE WAS TOO GIRLY FOR HER SON.

And the son is more mature than her.

Imagine if he wanted white in the first place.

(via thefirebendingtitanshifter)

spacetwinks:

there’s been a lot of good jokes made about harry potter the series and harry potter the character in specific but the classic i keep returning to is this 32 second bit

(via thefirebendingtitanshifter)

THE FIRST TEN LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL

thebadwolfthatwaited:

1. We are here to help you.
2. You will have enough time to get to your class before
the bell rings.
3. The dress code will be enforced.
4. No smoking is allowed on school grounds.
5. Our football team will win the championship this year.
6. We expect more of you here.
7. Guidance counselors are always available to listen.
8. Your schedule was created with your needs in mind.
9. Your locker combination is private.
10. These will be the years you look back on fondly.

(via bootzie2)

mydogsnokes:

o yea the 90s. the 90s were great. fuckin sick. raw as hell. learning how to speak. crying for no reason. shitting in my diaper

(via clisorganized)

itseasytobemerry:

thismachinespewssarcasm:

itseasytobemerry:

why didn’t harry use the chamber of secrets when teaching dumbledore army? i mean, only HE could open the door?

because the giant basilisk skeleton might have been a distraction

if anything it sets the mood

(Source: itseasytoremember, via sarmanda)

reblogs this to followers who don't interact with me

Zero - Who was your last text from?

One - What/who is your icon?

Two- Your relationship status?

Three - Have you ever lost a close friend?

Four - What is your current mood?

Five - What’s your brother(s)/sister(s)names?

Six - Where do you wish you were right now?

Seven - Have a crazy side?

Eight - Ever had a near death experience?

Nine- Something you do a lot?

Ten - Angry at anyone?

Eleven - What’s stopping you from going for the person you like ?

Twelve - When was the last time you cried?

Thirteen- What are you really good at ?

Fourteen - What do you think about when you are falling asleep?

Fifteen- What were you doing yesterday at 10pm?

Sixteen - Do you prefer light or dark hair on the opposite sex ?

Seventeen - Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?

Eighteen - What is/are your favorite band(s)? .

Nineteen - What are you doing right now?

Twenty - Who do you trust 100% right now?

Twenty one - Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?

Twenty two - Heavy metal music?

Twenty three- Who Was the last person you hugged.

Twenty four- Is there anything you’re hiding from someone?

Twenty five - Who are you thinking of right now?

Twenty six - What should you be doing right now?

Twenty seven - What are you listening to?

Twenty eight - You need new jeans. Quick where do you go?

Twenty nine - Who was the last person who yelled at you?

Thirty - Do you act differently around the person you like?

Thirty one - What is your eye colour?

Thirty two - Who was the last person to make you laugh?

Thirty three - Who was the last person to make you angry?

Thirty four - Hello Kitty or dora?

Thirty five - Is your hair naturally curly or straight?

Thirty six - Hug anyone of opposite sex in past 24 hours?

Thirty seven - One thing you want right now?

Thirty eight - Will you fall in love in the next few months?

Thirty nine - What does the 5th text in your inbox say?

Forty - Are you worried about the future?

Forty one - Are you happy with life right now?

Forty two - Are you currently jealous?

Forty three – Who's your best guy friend?

Forty four -Do you forgive or forget?

Forty five - What do you miss the most about elementary school?

Forty six - Favorite Disney Channel show ?

Forty Seven - What are you looking forward to?

Forty Eight - Does anyone like you right now?

Forty Nine- Lyrics to the song you’re listening to?

m0shmonster:

stunningpicture:

It’s all a matter of perspective

that’s the tightest shit I’ve ever seen

(via usscapaldi)

Thursday, August 28, 2014

urulokid:

urulokid:

poutineisdelicious:

xekstrin:

majere636:

arachnofiend:

marapetsrules:

bobfoxsky:

“You fool. No man can kill me.”

How many times am I allowed to reblog this before it gets weird?

image

Fun facts: Tolkien constructed this scene because he came out of Macbeth thinking that Shakespeare had missed a golden opportunity with the ”Be bloody, bold, and resolute; laugh to scorn the power of man, for none of woman born shall harm Macbeth” prophecy

Being letdown by Macbeth is apparently a significant factor in Tolkien’s writing because the Ent/Huorn attack on Isengard was the result of his disappointment that the whole “til Birnam Wood come to Dunsinane” thing was just some dudes holding sticks and not actual ambulatory trees.

so he basically took his favorite shakespeare headcanons and put them into his AU fic

This revelation just knocked me over.

LET ME TELL YOU A THING ABOUT JOHN RONALD REUEL TOLKIEN. BACK THE FUCK UP SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING YOU’RE FUCKING JON SNOW HERE. LET ME TELL U A THING

JONNY T WAS LITERALLY THE BIGGEST FANBOY TO EVER WALK THE EARTH. LITERALLY THIS FUCKIN NERD WENT INTO WORLD WAR ONE AND WROTE NORSEFIC EDDA FANFIC IN THE TRENCHES AND SENT IT TO ALL HIS FRIENDS WHO WERE PRESUMABLY LIKE “JOHN WHAT THE FUCK”

BUT IT DOESN’T END THERE

HIS WIFE? MADE HER AND HIMSELF INTO SELF-INSERT OCS IN SAID FIC. ALSO MADE HIMSELF A TOTAL TYR SELF INSERT CHARACTER. ALL VERY DRAMATIC. KEPT WRITING THIS FIC UNTIL IT WAS HUGE. AFTER HE DIED HIS SON PUBLISHED IT AND CALLED IT THE SILMARILLION. JRR YOU FUCKIN NERD

WAIT I’M NOT FUCKING DONE YET. TREEBEARD? BASED THE WAY HE TALKED OF HIS OLD FRIEND JACK WHO YOU ALL MIGHT KNOW AS CS LEWIS. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT NARNIA MOTHERFUCKER. WROTE HIM INTO LORD OF THE RINGS AKA THE SEQUEL TO THE SEQUEL OF HIS ORIGINAL FANFIC MASTERPIECE. CS LEWIS FUCKING HATED LORD OF THE RINGS. TOLKIEN FUCKING HATED NARNIA. BASICALLY THEY STARTED THE OXFORD PROFESSOR LIVEJOURNAL CLUB AND THEY FLAMED EACH OTHER’S SHIT RELENTLESSLY YET REMAINED BFFS

SHELOB? FUCKING TARANTULA BIT J-TIDDY ON THE FOOT WHEN HE WAS LIKE 3. WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS.

HIS AUNT’S HOUSE? NAMED BAG END. YEAH YOU GUESSED IT WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS

THIS FUCKING DORKUS SUPREME MADE UP HIS OWN LANGUAGE. WAIT NO IM WRONG. HE MADE UP LIKE 80 LANGUAGES AND DIALECTS AND ALPHABETS AND SHIT 

BEST PART OF ALL?? HIS OWN LAST NAME, TOLKIEN, WAS DERIVED FROM THE GERMAN “TOLKHUN” MEANING “FOOLHARDY”. DOES THAT RING A BELL TO ANYONE FAMILIAR TO LORD OF THE RINGS??? BECAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT PEREGRIN “PIPPIN” TOOK’S LIKE FUCKING CATCHPHRASE WAS “FOOL OF A TOOK”. TOLKIEN FIC’D HIS OWN FAMILIAL LINGUISTIC HISTORY INTO HIS WORK WHAT A DWEEB

IN 2008 HE RANKED 6TH ON A LIST OF THE TOP 50 BRITISH WRITERS SINCE 1945. HE WAS A PROFESSOR OF LANGUAGES AND OTHER IMPORTANT STUFFY SHIT AT OXFORD

AND JRR TOLKIEN WAS THE BIGGEST DWEEB EVER TO LIVE

THE END

(Source: the-peoples-of-middle-earth, via usscapaldi)


cashtier:

when someone do a draw for u
image
image

image

(via seraphsylph)

Thursday, August 28, 2014

kotakucom:

Japan’s really good at textbook doodles. More examples here.

(via lynnemily96)


toastoat:

toastoat:

i wish when i felt threatened or angry or embarrased my hair would do the expandy fluffy thing like in ghibli films

(via lynnemily96)

flyawaymax:

learning to draw is like driving on the highway like yeah sure you need to be watching other people but you REALLY need to focus on your own lane and your own destination or youre gonna follow that stupid fucking minivan all the way to tuskegee and then what. you didnt want to go to tuskegee. why did you follow that van look now youre in fucking tuskegee.

(via lynnemily96)

liquar:

takethesanity:

squidwurd:

main goals when going to a friends house:
-pet dog
-avoid parent
-don’t clog toilet

+ obtain wifi password

- try not to die of thirst when they don’t offer you water

(via lynnemily96)

Thursday, August 28, 2014

amidala-skywalkers:

# no-one promotes confident body image like rebel wilson # favourite quote of the whole movie

(via bootzie2)